Giving It All Away
by SeungSeiRan
Summary: You looked so happy that I almost cried. Hwoarang x Julia.


This is NOT a happy fic. Period. I'm warning you.

Disclaimer: Don't own Tekken. In this case, thankfully so.

* * *

And all I can do is watch you stare.

Away from me.

Away from what it's like to be a shadow while you're up on Cloud Nine.

* * *

The rain will be the death of me one day. I shall die from pneumonia caused by hours of wandering through rivers made of concrete and asphalt with my bare arms enduring every lash cracking down on me. Drops of water ignite my eyes and make the world clear as day. These are the skies that I will look up to and hope to God that your eyes see what I see. I spy with my little eye something beginning with 'S'.

A sweet stall which hurriedly folds up at the sound of impending thunder. A girl called 'Sun-Hwa' who once told me I had nice eyes. Silver bells on bicycles which blur as they strive ahead to dry land. The soundtrack of my life muting to a haunting symphony known as 'silence'. Surrender to the lightning, oh torrid soul of mine, for these are the only fireworks that may light up our life. Behold, the storm is coming. With it comes the aftermath reeking of scorched egos. Sweetheart, I never told you I loved you. I was just in it for the novelty. Hear that shatter? Only your heart, doll, you'll get over this sooner than later.

Two years, dear. Two years of lingering in your light has made me a bona-fide poet without a dream. Moody, restless, senseless, prone to outbursts of irrationality, no thanks to your colored words still chiming in my head.

But I couldn't blame you even if I tried. You're already gone. And each day that passes, it gets a little harder to keep my listless feet in check. Tongue in cheek, I grin and bear it as long as the clouds steer clear of the sun.

The invite came earlier this morning, embossed with swirling gold calligraphy that made my mind spin. It's still unopened.

You've already gone.

So I already know.

Hold my heart for a second. I'm almost on my knees, doubled over with bitterness and the sounds of raindrops crashing down on me as the sun shines down on you somewhere in Paradise. Sweetheart, you've turned me inside out and all you had to do was sketch my name onto paper when you needed a smile. May I? Can I? After all, it's a wedding you're talking about, a cause for celebration. Hallelujah.

What do you want me to do? Crack a joke and shower you with confetti, watch you laugh in return, watch you spin around on your highest heels and let him fling you around the ballroom floor with carefree abandon, watch you watch me as you expect me to fake a smile for one measly pathetic day of my life?

_Do come._

All this trouble for a hopeless reject like me.

They're beautiful, aren't they? Storms, I mean. Impending grace on grey winds like I imagine them. They're everything I need in a disaster, all-encompassing lashes of cold comfort which drown out the groans that manage to escape my throat, everything you're not…

* * *

When you finally return my gaze, you ask about time.

"For what?"

To tell him that you've seen the light.

"How?"

You don't know. You just do.

Being the coward I am, I push you away.

To him.

* * *

The letter still remains on the table, words gleaming like the cold steel of a sheathed sword. It's stopped raining but my eyes still run.

Using the tip of the knife, I cut myself another scar. This one, I shall say if anyone bothers to notice, was caused by a fall. In the club, on a piece of broken glass. Yeah, that could work. It was… understandable, as you'd say. Another addition to my growing collection. See, I have almost every color imaginable, blue, black, purple, black and now red. It shines so fresh on my skin, so lovely, so shiny in the happy sunlight.

You know what? I think I'll add another. 'X' marks the spot, you know.

It's late at night over here so I hope the stars shine down on you. I hope that angels grant you with everything you ever wanted, I hope that storm clouds wash away this pain of mine, I hope that he loves you more than I ever could, I hope that morning rises soon enough, I hope that storms will drown out every cry I raise.

Another one here.

Another one there.

Another, another, another, and _another_…

There, my arms sting so hard that I can almost forgot your face as darkness leads me in.

* * *

I've never seen you so happy. Almost makes me want to cry.

I watch you spin around on your highest heels.

I watch you smile for the camera and me behind the lens.

I watch as you fling your bouquet through the masses, watching as wild orchids soar over my head, leaving me with nothing but a snatch of their passing scent.

I watch you fall back into his arms with a soft smiling sigh.

Nothing makes sense to me and yet it does.

I raise my glass and force the sunshine back into my eyes.

* * *

A drizzle begins as I set out on my nightly roam. Laughter rings out from some corner of town but my scars throb harder than before. There's a storm brewing somewhere and my heart feels it so. I will go wherever the wind wails for the past and listen to it bellow for lost souls at sea. Raindrops fall, dance on concrete and asphalt, then vanish for good. They sneak down my collar, drenching my marred skin. My wounds scream louder.

As the story goes, there was a happy ending for the princess and her knight in shining armor. No one cares to remember the side characters, anyone but the leading man.

I reach out my hand to catch empty air. Devoid of warmth and love, it trembles.

It's only me.

But you'll never remember me this way. I've made sure of that.


End file.
